Archive for 'Freaks' category

Finally, a Michael Jackson post on Grods

Posted by Bron on Friday 3 July 2009
Categories: Freaks, Music, Weird shit  Tags: Tags: , ,

How is possible that a Michael Jackson impersonator looks stranger than the man himself?

Who is who?

jason-jackson

“I believe I am alive today because God saved me for this – to make people happy. I have a message to give, the same as Michael,” he said yesterday.

Yeah, um. Okay.

Who’s the moron?

Posted by Scott on Friday 5 June 2009
Categories: Environment, Freaks, Prodos  Tags: Tags: , , , ,

GrodsCorp’s favourite über-freak, Prodos, has a long history (scroll to point five) of being hostile towards those who hold opposing views, despite his oft-repeated claim of being “objective” and “constructive”. For somebody who is so apparently committed to rational debate, our Prodos can only tolerate his own way of thinking. For once I am in complete agreement with Dr (sic) John ‘TingTong’ Ray who said of Prodos: “[his] ego has run away with him. He thinks that his own approach is the only defensible one.”

The latest self-aggrandising project to spew forth from Prodos’ ego is the objective and constructive Are You A Moron? project, which requires you to answer “yes” if you believe in any of the following:

  • Global warming
  • Scientific consensus
  • That the debate is over
  • Renewable energy
  • Taxing carbon
  • Green jobs
  • the idea CO2 is a pollutant

As is the way with all of Prodos’ projects (Privatize The ABC, Celebrate Capitalism, Thinker To Thinker, I Love Prodos etc.) he seems to be more interested in the pithy slogans, domain names and merchandise than he does in the issue. This particular project boasts at least four domain names (areyouamoron.com, greenpoppycock.com, carbondioxideisnotapollutant.com and greensliepeopledie.com) — conservative estimates put the total number of domain names owned by Prodos at over 9000 — a blog with links to stuff other people wrote, and a massive range of stupid merchandise like this:

Someone needs to proof read Prodos’ slogans for grammar before he prints them

Now all he needs is a matching song, perhaps along the lines of this one he wrote about Teh Moooooooslems.

Isalarmism

Posted by John Surname on Thursday 14 May 2009
Categories: Freaks, Religion, Science  Tags: Tags: , , ,

The Gentle Right like to preach that global warming is “Leftist alarmism” despite the fact it’s based on sound scientific evidence (and why will no-one debate me? Oh, that’s right! I keep winning).

Alarmism obviously isn’t this:

When I grow up I want to be a principal or a caterpillar!

Nothing alarmist about that.

I knew it! Those Obama-is-a-Mooooooslem nutters at A Western Heart aren’t nutters, and Andrew “Al Gore is fat” Bolt’s rantings aren’t rantings. US President Barack Obama and former Vice President Al Gore are both knowingly profiting from the swine flu outbreak that isn’t an accident of nature but is actually a bio-terrorism attack.

The latest bioterrorism attack by the New World Order is likely a beta test. Yes, it is a bioterrorism attack. It was a hybrid strain created from human, swine, and bird flu from North America, Europe, and Asia. It was created in a laboratory. This doesn’t happen in nature.

[...]

You might want to question who is making a profit on this as well. Barack Obama, Al Gore, and Donald Rumsfeld all own shares of the company who makes the Tamiflu drug to treat this virus.

Apparently swine flu is an effort by the “ruling elite” to reduce the world’s population. It is by the same people who put flouride in your water “causing your brain, liver, and bones to rot and decay” because “the government hates you and wants to kill you”.

You heard it here first.

Brave KG

Posted by Scott on Sunday 22 March 2009
Categories: Blogosphere, Freaks  Tags: Tags: ,

“KG” writes a balanced, rational and measured post in response to a planned protest by Islamic students.

go shag a camel, you creeps!
Yes, it’s a deliberately offensive header. As it should be, when talking about the camelshagging raghead followers of the paedophile prophet.

Tell us what you really think, KG.

But apparently there’s a simple solution to the problems posed by these “camelshagging ragheads”: speak up.

Grow some balls, Westerners. Speak up. Speak up at least for your children’s sakes if not for yourselves… Consider this–those of us alive right now may be the only ones who can save the West.
Do it, or measure your daughter for her first burqa…..

And how is “KG” speaking up? By posting this filth behind the safety of a pseudonym on an obscure blog read only by other brave pseudonymous bloggers. Oh, and by calling for the assassination of President Barack Obama and the murder of lazy welfare recipients.

Then again, maybe poor KG’s just got his cranky pants on at the moment and he’ll be thinking a lot more rationally in a few months.

please excuse me while I go and strangle something…
I’ve stopped smoking….

Flawless reasoning

Posted by Scott on Tuesday 17 March 2009
Categories: Environment, Freaks, Politics  Tags: Tags: , ,

Somebody call Teh Press! Carbon’s role in AGW has been clarified by the Citizens Electoral Council (who?), and we need more carbon!

Nature craves more carbon dioxide

Government policies to force drastic cuts in carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions, out of fear of CO2 as a “pollutant”, are insane… The global average atmospheric CO2 concentration is currently a tiny 387 ppm (parts per million)—just a trace gas—and trees and plants are craving for more, yet fools are threatening to decimate our economy, in order to reduce this life-giving gas.

If this is true it will cause a total realignment of thinking across the world and a total change in behaviour; it’s revolutionary stuff. What sort of evidence is behind this theory?

Commercial greenhouse operators are advised to add enough CO2 to maintain about 1,000 ppm around their plants… The dinosaurs survived just fine when CO2 concentrations exceeded 2,000 ppm… Exhaled human breath contains about 4% CO2. That is 40,000 ppm…

Oh, dear. Is it even worth wasting the kilojoule or two of energy required to type a critique of those arguments?

Win $5 from Prodos

Posted by Scott on Thursday 5 March 2009
Categories: Blogosphere, Freaks, Prodos  Tags: Tags: , , ,

I don’t know how I missed this, but Prodos has started a competition to win a weekly cash prize of five dollars! All you need to do is start a free Thinker To Thinker blog (unless you “hate capitalism”, in which case you can “bugger off”) and use some of Prodos’ favourite quotes in your posts.

Over the next week write 3 posts on your TTT blog – each of which includes at least one quote from any of these “Big Seven” Thinkers:

* Aristotle
* John Locke
* Adam Smith
* Thomas Jefferson
* Frederic Bastiat
* Ludwig von Mises
* Ayn Rand

But it’s only $5, I hear you say. Prodos reckons $5 can buy you heaps.

Q: What can I buy with five dollars?
A: Glory

Glory. I has it.

Oddities

Posted by Bron on Monday 23 February 2009
Categories: Freaks, Public transport, Sydney, Weird shit  Tags: Tags: , , ,

So, I’m on the train home this evening and I’m sending a text message to someone and I look up across the aisle and there’s this old, shabby-looking guy sitting there with an extinguished half-smoked cigarette hanging out of his left nostril.

Guess who

Posted by Scott on Sunday 15 February 2009
Categories: Freaks, Religion  Tags: Tags: ,

Which sick group of excuses for human beings said the following?

THANK GOD FOR KILLER FIRES & FLOODS, 100+ DEAD; PRAY FOR MANY MORE

Was it evil mooooooslem jihadists?

Wrong! It was brave Christian soldiers (PDF). Perhaps they should give Danny a call.

(H/T: weez)

When you think of the word “soldier”, what springs to your mind?

Fearless? Brave? Heroic? Fighting for what’s good and true?

When white supremacist group The Southern Cross Soldiers decided to hold a rally on Australia Day, they thought the beach would be their oyster, and the media their bitch. What patriotic, beach loving Aussie could ignore their call for immigrants to fuck off?

Sadly, it was not to be.

You could tell it would be an exercise in idiocy from the moment the first little troopers arrived under The Clocks and began casting anxious eyes over the Australia Day parade rolling down Swanston St.

Chinese marchers with their dragons, Turkish dancers, new arrivals from Africa – the sort of people your typical Southern Cross Soldier wants to send back where they came from.

But outnumbered as they were, there wasn’t a peep out of these heroes, whose ranks swelled gradually to about 30.

Thirty? Sounds like a right proper army to me.

And at Mordialloc’s multicultural melting pot, well you just had to laugh. They congregated for a while at the foot of the pier like virgins at an orgy, glancing anxiously down the beach and at all those non-Anglo faces, who paid them no heed whatsoever.

When a couple of brawny Pacific Islanders ambled past, their silence was deafening.

[...]

When a Herald Sun photographer tried to snap their pictures, that was the moment to demonstrate courage. Fifteen on one, those are the sort of odds cowards like best.

There was a bit of pushing and shoving and lens-blocking, and one big kid struck a boxing pose and offered to punch some heads.

He didn’t and they drifted away on a cloud of obscenity to have another go at remembering the words to Advance Australia Fair.

It’s good to know John Ray has these guys on his side, because when the New Soviets come they will not be spared.

Play sport and go straight to HELL!

Posted by Scott on Sunday 25 January 2009
Categories: Freaks, Religion, Them crazy...  Tags: Tags: ,

Up to two million people gathered in Washington DC to watch President Obama’s inauguration, and with that many people around it’s only natural that freaks and nutters of all denominations flocked to the crowd to harass and preach. A friend of a friend on Facebook posted this photo that she took on inauguration day.

A typically even-handed and fair-minded message from compassionate and tolerant Christians

Porno freaks, homos and Mormons I understand — of course they’re going to hell. But sports nuts?

Capitalist crossword broken

Posted by Scott on Saturday 24 January 2009
Categories: Freaks, Politics, Prodos  Tags: Tags: , ,

GrodsCorp’s favourite freak, Prodos, has taken to inflicting capitalist crosswords upon his handful of reluctant supporters at weekly Discover Capitalism meetings.

Krazy kapitalists enjoying Ayn Rand and pizza.

Prodos has kindly made that meeting’s crossword available as a PDF download so us ordinary punters can have a crack. I decided to give it a go but got stuck on one-across.

The crossword is clearly broken

Try it for yourself, email Prodos for the answers, and if you are successful you too might win an awesome prize like this brainy capitalist did on the night of the meeting.

“Just what I’ve always wanted: a capitalist matchbox car!”

An evening with Dan and Julian

Posted by Scott on Thursday 15 January 2009
Categories: Freaks, Music  Tags: Tags: , ,

I went out with Spykey last night to see her One True Love, Dan Sultan, play at the Night Market. Spykey, along with every other woman in the crowd, went all gooey-eyed while Dan was on stage, while a crowd full of uncomfortable boyfriends were made to feel inadequate. At the end of the concert, in an attempt to make me feel better, Spykey said I “look a bit like Dan Sultan, but skinnier, shorter, and with glasses.”

Thanks a fucken million, Spykey.

Anyway, after eating some food from the market we went for a walk to kill the hour before Dan took to the stage. We ended up at an inner city bar and ordered a couple of drinks. On the stage at this bar was a gaggle of awkward and nerdlingerly social outcasts getting ready to play a gig. They were doing a soundcheck and Spykey and I couldn’t believe our ears.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Julian Williams via my iPhone sound recording application.

I shit you not, this went on for the whole time we were there and it was extremely difficult not to break out giggling and point rudely. They took themselves so seriously. The best part was that as we left they were getting ready to collect a door charge. Brazen!

So I simply had find out more about this troupe of freaks.

Hello, My name is Julian Williams and I’ve been doing my thing in music and experimental theatre in Melbourne for years now, how they go so fast.

[...]

…there are conventional instruments like guitars, organs, and wind instruments. There are also sampled everyday sounds from around the house, generally slowed down or speeded up, and then harmonies galore. It reflects my taste in music from the Beach Boys to Pauline Oliveros, although the music I listen to is all over the shop, so it’s hard to make comparisons. The byways of this musical world are as varied as a china polluted stream.

[...]

Lyrically, I’m writing about my usual interests: spirituality, meditation, understanding humans role in the universe, various rites and ceremonies of tribes in Africa, South America and Asia. Yep, I love the arcane and esoteric landscape my fellow beings. The process of writing lyrics is weird. It’s like I’m the antenna catching vibrations, or like a radio picking up frequencies in the air. Even I don’t know what they mean most of the time. I like to give each listener the opportunity to make their own meaning. I don’t consider myself the author of the work, just the facilitator. My feelings about the album are no different to those reading this. The power of mystery is a great thing to be enjoyed by husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, mums and dads, and every being with ears.

I don’t consider myself the author of this warning never to subject yourself to a “concert” by Julian Williams, just the facilitator.

All of Miranda Devine’s predictions are coming true!!11!

Posted by Jason on Thursday 20 November 2008
Categories: Freaks, Media, Sydney, Them crazy...  Tags: Tags: , ,

Miranda called it right – the minute bong-zombie Barack Obama was elected the war on drugs went up in smoke:

New South Wales farmers are being encouraged to start growing industrial hemp.

The Government recently passed legislation allowing the plant to be grown for use in products ranging from bio-fuel to dog food…

Mr Macdonald says hemp growth could become a lucrative industry for NSW.

“Already we’ve had over 200 farmers express interest in growing hemp across the state,” he said.

“It could become quite a significant crop in a very short period of time, particularly as various companies utilise the products of it for that broad range of products that can be created using industrial hemp as a base.”

The use of hemp in dog food might put smiles on the faces of pensioners, but at what cost? Imagine, with Miranda, what rural New South Wales will soon look like.

The US election came and went, and now it’s time to laugh ourselves stupid at those who predicted an overwhelming win for McCain.

Political Lizard:

So sa (sic) we start this election We (sic) see that Obama starts off with approximately 36.8 million votes and McCain starts with 36.6 million votes. This is a 200,000 vote lead prior to independents being included. If these voters are evenly split We (sic) could have a situation where one candidate wins the popular vote and another wins the electoral college. A split in independents favors McCain. If McCain maintains his slight lead among independent (sic) he wins similar to 2004.

ChronWatch:

Obama’s biggest problem is that the majority of Americans racially are white. Even Hispanics, racially, are white. Once you get by all the usual politically correct blather about race, the likelihood that whites will vote for Obama is slim to none when they get in the privacy of the voting booth.
That is why John McCain, unless he selects a serial killer as his vice president running mate, is likely to be the next President of the United States of America.

So based on the numbers that I curently are seeing and what I know about neuroscience, I will make the frightening conclusion, that it most likely will be McCain, that will win. How the Hell can that be, you’re asking?

Well, firstly it is known that the place where the election is held influences how people are voting. If you regular go to church in the USA, which is mainly anti-abortion, it means that you indirectly supports the republicans. The same is true for the so-called swing voters. When they see a cross on the wall, makes them more likely to vote republican. And as the most common voting place in the USA is a church, that is the first reason.

Life In The Field:

SO if the one in six rule holds true, then of those 5.1 Mil who say they support the Messiah, 850,000 of them will actually vote for McCain, bringing McCain’s total to a whopping 4.25 Million, EXACTLY THE SAME AMOUNT AS OBAMAS new total!!!

NY Politics discussion board:

The “MSM” or Main stream media is neither main stream or media.
The MSM is a high technology version of a Karl Marx mind programming
bullhorn that is infested with homosexuals and globalists that hate
capitalism and America.
If you listen to or believe the “Media” in America you are an idiot

When queeried (sic) on what he meant by this, the intrepid poster expanded upon this thesis:

The vast majority of homosexuals are atheist and liberal. That is a
fact. Also journalism is a favorite career path of homosexuals and
socialists.
Journalists are like lawyers. They create their own job via paper and
bullshit. Both are human barnacles on society that produce nothing of value.

Edward David Gil (cached, original deleted):

Here is how “the penny dropped” and I suddenly realized that McCain will beat Obama decisively in this November’s presidential election (as unlikely as it may seem now in July): it was when I read that the city of Denver has been giving the Democratic National Committee’s “Host Committee” members a pass on the city’s tax on gasoline for about four months, before it was disclosed.

Daily AntiKos

Reasons why:
1. Conservatives don’t participate in polls.
2. People have felt intimidated into saying they’re supporting Obama.
3. Sarah Palin will produce a turnout of the base as never seen before.
4. Coal states have shifted toward McCain.
5. God is conservative.

Owned. Every last one.


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