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Catwoman

Saturday 28 April 2007, 4:28 pm

Categories: Melbourne, Public transport, Weird shit

So I’m sitting on the 96 tram from East Brunswick yesterday afternoon when a crazy looking lady gets on. You know the type: those people who look right at home on public transport with their mis-matched clothing and bizarre features like glitter hair clips and rainbow socks. She was carrying one of those plastic tartan $2 bags that are only used by people moving house or people without a house.

Weird lady sits down across the aisle from me, puts the $2 bag on her lap, unzips it and — wait for it — pulls out a cat.

I shit you not. A fully grown, long-hair domestic cat.

I was waiting for the cat to jump down and run like hell up and down the tram clawing passengers’ eyes out like our Napoleon would if he were in a similar situation, but this little furball was obviously used to such treatment as it sat calmly on the weird lady’s lap while she cooed loudly and kissed it on the head. After a while she turned it over, cradled it like a baby, and started grooming it with a brush.

Some ten minutes of grooming later the weird lady noticed with a start that she was nearly at her stop so she roughly shoved the cat back in the bag, zipped it up, and ran off the tram.

Who’d drive a car when such fantastic entertainment is available for free on public transport?

8 Comments

Jangari (Sunday 29 April 2007, 11:17 am) #

Reminds me of a similar instance a while back.
I was on the bus and a lady sat next to me. She was wearing a big fur coat, black, I don’t know if it was real or not, but it was thick, shiny black fur. Then I noticed out of the corner of my eye that the coat appeared to move. Sure enough, she had a lapdog under her coat, with exactly the same fur.
It really freaked me out.
The Editor (Sunday 29 April 2007, 4:32 pm) #

The coat used to be the lapdog’s brothers and sisters.
John Surname (Sunday 29 April 2007, 9:07 pm) #

I often go out adorned only by my cat.
Fang (Monday 30 April 2007, 12:18 am) #

If you want to be entertained then get a number 16 tram during a full moon - no cats only imaginary friends.
Mikey (Monday 30 April 2007, 9:53 pm) #

When I used to catch the bus there was this mentally impaired woman who would catch the same one as me. Without fail she’d start heckling the bus driver loudly in a Bad Boy Bubby voice.

“I’m goanna be late ya f_cking c___”. Every day without fail.

I had arthritus at the time. I associate the pain with hearing crazies mutter in the street.
The Editor (Monday 30 April 2007, 10:03 pm) #

I watched Bad Boy Bubby just last weekend on DVD. Maybe next time I see the crazy catwoman she’ll have wrapped the kitty in glad wrap and will be screaming “CAT BE DEAD!”
Club Troppo » Missing Link (somewhat belated) (Tuesday 1 May 2007, 2:41 pm) #

[...] that Fair Trade Coffee isn’t as fair as it’s cracked up to be, while the award for outstanding cat story of the week goes to The Editor of [...]
rj (Tuesday 4 September 2007, 8:30 pm) #

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