GrodsCorp

Nowhere left to go

Wednesday 20 February 2008, 8:51 pm

The Editor

Categories: Blogosphere, Politics

Tags: AntRogenous, BridgitGread, FalseLeftRightDichotomy, Gollum, JohnSurname, KevinRudd, LatteLefties, left, right

Apparently GrodsCorp is “Australia’s hard left,” according to some hard right website. “Left” I’ll accept but I reckon “hard left” is a bit, well, harsh. (Not that I believe in the false left/right dichotomy anyway.)

I’m not very hard; I’m soft as hell. Ant and John are the very opposite of hard. And I’ve never met Bridgit so I can only speculate as to her hardness or otherwise. I mean, we’re so soft that we can’t drink lattes after midday or else we can’t sleep at night. We’re so soft that we put a dash of lemonade in our expensive imported lagers. We’re so soft that if a cafe only has white supermarket bread for our sandwich and nothing with rye in it we cry.

Apparently we’re also “like some kind of a Gollum with a prize” because we’re gloating over Kevin Rudd’s victory. That insult conjours an awesome image in my mind so it’s okay. (Not to mention that it’s utterly true.)

Gollum

He hasss a latte. Gives it to meeeee! My precioussssss.

21 Comments

Mikey (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 9:11 pm) #

Hard left eh? Noice. Wear it with pride.

Even if it hurts your tender spots.
krypto (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 9:20 pm) #

I don’t see the insult, now if someone called me a right wing redneck it’s time to throw hands but “hard left” is like calling someone “most excellent”.
Ant Rogenous (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 10:10 pm) #

Hard left, huh? I blame the Fleshlight.
Damian (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 10:22 pm) #

Hard left my arse. Reminds me of the time some internet called Onymous a Marxist.

I guess if you reckon Rudd is a socialist (as the Midnight Sun Collective does) then anyone left of Reagan is a fucken Trot.
The Editor (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 10:24 pm) #

Maybe I should just get it over with and replace the picture of Joe in the blog header with a picture of a Fleshlight.
Damian (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 10:27 pm) #

Ah, bugger. I was talking about “some internet dump“.

I reckon you should give Gollum the fleshlight.
Dave from Albury (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 10:29 pm) #

I don’t think that anyone who’d looked at the photos of you swanning around whilst on strike could possibly think you were hard anything.

I think it’s funny that all of the epithets of ‘teh left’ are meant to be effeminate (latte, chardonnay, chattering), but as soon as the Man of Steel gets his arse kicked we’re all evil hardcore lefties.

It must be awesome to have no sense of cognitive dissonance.
Damian (Wednesday 20 February 2008, 10:32 pm) #

Just wended my way around to the pool room. How good is gropecreep?!
Skeptic (Thursday 21 February 2008, 9:12 am) #

Anyone who uses the words “cognitive dissonance” is, by definition, a hard-as-they-come-Lefty with a capital L.
Suburban Marxist (Thursday 21 February 2008, 9:27 am) #

(Not that I believe in the false left/right dichotomy anyway.)

That was a joke, yeah?
The Editor (Thursday 21 February 2008, 9:30 am) #

Yeah. A little shout-out to Lachlan Connor. It’s one of his lines.
John Surname (Thursday 21 February 2008, 9:42 am) #

I laughed, Ed.

It does make me wonder whether these guys can actually tell we’re taking the piss when we talk about lattes. Did I just blow it? That everything on this blog isn’t 100% serious?
Ant Rogenous (Thursday 21 February 2008, 10:52 am) #

You’ve blown it for me, John. Ed, my resignation is in the mail.
Damian (Thursday 21 February 2008, 11:25 am) #

I have to be more discerning about what I read. First I learn that Grods is “hard left”, and now apparently the Guardian is TROTSKYIST!
Bron (Thursday 21 February 2008, 12:05 pm) #

At least we on ‘teh left’ are a colourful mob, with many names to describe us, according to our varying levels of ‘leftism’. Or not. Think about it (the following I have seen around places):

hard left
soft left
chardonnay socialists
latte-sipping lefties
bleeding heart liberals
stupid leftists
Marxist ratbags
left-wing do-gooders
trendy inner city types

And where are all the names for the right-wingers? One that comes up with regularity:

right-wing dickheads (’dickheads’ sometimes replaced with ‘cunts’ or ‘cockheads’ according to mood)

What a dull mob.
The Editor (Thursday 21 February 2008, 12:10 pm) #

I think it shows a real depth of personality, Bron. Not to mention all of the different types of coffee beverage that we like to enjoy:

* Latte
* Skinny latte
* Soy latte
* Decaf latte
* Skinny decaf latte
* Soy decaf latte
* 3/4 latte
* 1/2 full, 1/2 skinny latte

What do right-wing dickheads drink?

* Nescafe black
* Nescafe white
* …
* …
Bron (Thursday 21 February 2008, 12:18 pm) #

Yes, and don’t forget our excellent culinary tastes, as demonstrated by Craig on YouTube.

Spaghetti
Bolognaise
Meat
Vegetable
Vegetable
Vegetable

And what do the right-wing dickheads eat?

I’ll leave that blank for youse all to fill in. I’m afraid my first thought was too obvious.
Wah (Thursday 21 February 2008, 12:19 pm) #

The A Western Heart folk are surely a bunch of International Roast Racists
The Editor (Thursday 21 February 2008, 12:37 pm) #

International Roast? Sorry, you must mean teachers.
Ant Rogenous (Thursday 21 February 2008, 12:43 pm) #

They’re Pablo boys, I believe.
Suburban Marxist (Thursday 21 February 2008, 1:40 pm) #

Here’s one for the not-so-cryptic fascists MK and KG…hehehe…given their penchant for reductionism of the variety such as ‘terrorism is inherent to Islam’, I wonder what they will make of Xtianity now that the majority of its followers are now clearly a motley assortment of genetic freaks…

:-)

‘Out of Africa: Human odyssey is traced through DNA’.

One paper reveals that human genetic diversity decreases the further one gets from Africa, the cradle of humanity.
People of African descent are more varied genetically than Middle Easterners, who are in turn more diverse than either Asians or Europeans, the study found.

By the time Homo sapiens migrated to the Americas across the Bering Straits, diversity had dwindled even further.

The other investigation shows that Americans of European descent have more potentially damaging mutations in their DNA than African-Americans, a finding that settles a long-standing debate.

It is now clear, the researchers say, that all persons of European descent, and not just isolated geographic groups, experienced a “genetic bottleneck” — probably between 30,000 and 100,000 years ago — as a small, founding population moved into present-day Europe.

As a result, the gene pool in Europe was restricted, and possibly harmful mutations in DNA were handed down over the generations instead of being flushed out of the genome through the evolutionary process of natural selection.

http://news.theage.com.au/out-of-africa-human-odyssey-is-traced-through-dna/20080221-1tl7.html