GrodsCorp

Why are people so unkind?

Tuesday 26 February 2008, 8:41 am

The Editor

Categories: Bike riding

Tags: death, RoadRage, RoadRules

Riding my bike to work this morning I scored the double whammy of bicyclist experiences: abuse and near death.

First I was riding up a suburban one-way street (the right way) and preparing to turn right where the road met another at a T-intersection. The dude in the car behind me leaned out the window and yelled, “Get out of the middle of the road, dickhead!” You see, my crime was that I’m apparently supposed to give way to vehicles behind me.

Then I was cruising down a major-ish road in the bike lane when a car turned left into a side street right in front of me without indicating. I was so busy screeching my tires and fighting to keep control of the bike that I didn’t have time to extend a middle finger and yell some combination of swear words at him.

Sometimes I just can’t shake the impression that people in cars hate my guts and want me dead. All I want to do is get to work.

21 Comments

Wah (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 9:53 am) #

Don’t take it persoonally. Anyone prepared to yell out at you is probably the sort to put there mother in a nursing home and sell her house. He’s an A-grade arsehole and on your behalf I wish death on him.

Can I ask a question - as this could affect my judgement on such matters considerably? When you ride to work do you wear (to quote Ant Rogenous) wang pants and a bright coloured top advertising some obscure European ‘telekom’ firm?
The Editor (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:07 am) #

I understand the need for such a question to be asked, Wah. And fortunately I can answer in the negative. I do not own wang pants nor a tight top with advertising. I simply wear my normal clothes when riding my bike — the only modification being an elastic band around the bottom of my right hand pant leg.
keri (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:24 am) #

Lord. Sounds like something my brother would do. For some reason the sight of someone on a bike in front of him sends him into a fury.
Dave from Albury (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:34 am) #

Try being on a motorcycle, not only do we cop the ‘Sorry Mate I Didn’t See You’ crap it seems to be common practice for some drivers to try to knowingly nudge us off the road or drive with their front bumper centimetres off our back wheel. ‘

I can’t explain the thought process that makes these tossers think that it’d be okay to potentially kill someone, just because they’re on a motorbike. Of course if you so much as nudged their car in a parking lot they’d scream blue murder.

People who only ever travel in cars end up being lazy, inattentive drivers and as you almost found out this morning Ed, that’s a recipe for disaster.
Bron (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:34 am) #

GET OFF THE ROAD, DICKHEAD!! CAN’T YA SEE WHERE YA BLOODY GOIN’?!
keri (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:34 am) #

And articles like this don’t help:

http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,23277302-661,00.html

Can’t be arsed with the tags.
Wah (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:53 am) #

Glad to know you don’t squeeze into the wang Ed. Hence I feel you did not deserve such treatment.

While cyclists complain about their treatment on the road, what about the way they carry on on shared footpaths like at Southbank, where every morning I am almost cleaned by some pedalling fucktard who thinks “because I get treated like shit on the road, I’m going to be an arsehole to pedestrians just to prove that I am not at the bottom of the food chain”.
The Editor (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:54 am) #

I agree. Cyclists on footpaths need to be shot.
The Editor (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 11:08 am) #

Those stats aren’t very surprising, Keri. I agree that quite a lot of cyclists break the law and ride unsafely (a pox on their houses) but it’s a poor excuse for blanket hatred of all cyclists and unsafe behaviour towards them.
keri (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 11:30 am) #

I agree. I usually swat my brother with whatever is to hand if I’m in the car with him.

I don’t think people really grasp the fact that a car can be a weapon on the road.

But they are usually the kind of people who have trouble grasping anything.
krypto (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 1:03 pm) #

I knew this guy once, he used to get OFF the bike, go pull motorists like that out of their vehicles and knock 147 separate shades of spit out of them.
I never did it myself but I sure have been tempted a couple of times.
Magic Bellybutton (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 2:21 pm) #

…people in cars hate my guts and want me dead. All I want to do is get to work.

That’s the problem. They want to stop you from infecting their children with your leftard ideas. You commie bastard!
Bron (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 3:28 pm) #

Aaaaand they want to stop him corrupting young innocent minds with puns about the Fleshlight. Otherwise it’s a deep, dark descent to the pits of depravity and sinfulness and diseases.

Sounds fun, actually.
keri (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 3:35 pm) #

You’d have more chance of staying disease free if you were using a fleshlight rather than random street workers.

Unless you were sharing the fleshlight around. Which is a very, very creepy thought.
The Editor (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 3:39 pm) #

Unless you were sharing the fleshlight around. Which is a very, very creepy thought.

There must be some sort of term for just such a grossness. Something along the lines of “circle jerk” or “soggy Sao.”

Just saying.
keri (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 3:41 pm) #

Posse Pussy?
The Editor (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 3:51 pm) #

Ka-ching!

Comment of the day.
Bridgit Gread (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 4:54 pm) #

Was the car a rusty old eight-cylinder with a Confederate flag on the door and a ‘NO GUN REFORM’ sticker on the bumper? It might’ve been KG or MK.
brokenleftleg (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 5:30 pm) #

Don’t worry my young apprentice. With experience you will learn to spot dickheads from 200 meters. You will also become skilled in the art of kicking out tail lights when said morons cut you off.
“Sorry about your tail light mate, but if you opened your eyes while driving, it would still be in one piece.” a phrase I have mastered.
Damian (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 10:50 pm) #

Ed, was the bloke who yelled at you driving a wooden car by any chance?

Hint hint, nudge nudge, ;;.
The Editor (Tuesday 26 February 2008, 11:32 pm) #

I doubt those kind of cars could make it to Melbourne from whence they came.