grodscorp@grods.comGrodsPoll: What do Young Liberals use for contraception?
 | Posted by The Editor on Thursday 28 February 2008, 8:49 am Categories: GrodsPoll, Politics Tags: contraception, YoungLiberals |
It’s a conundrum that has long puzzled right-thinking (pun intended) Australians, but brokenleftleg has re-asked the question and The Happy Revolutionary has offered the first four possible answers; I added the final two.
Vote early, vote often. Poll closes COB tomorrow (Friday).
UPDATE (9.30am): I’ve added a seventh option, as suggested by Damian.
What do Young Liberals use for contraception?
GrodsThink Ep.31 (16/9/08)
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:24 am #Damian
A young Lib I knew swore that he didn’t use artificial contraceptives. He used a method which he called, “Three-quick-strokes-then-heya!-Get-that-on-your-norgs!”
Oh dear. Am I allowed to post such things?
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:31 am #keri
That kind of thing is probably acceptable if you ask first, well the norg bit, anyway(Although that could just be me) but, frankly, I wouldn’t be letting Liberal Lovejuice anywhere near me in the first place. Anyone who lets a Liberal get that much lovin’ deserves everything they (don’t) get.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:33 am #keri
Jebus. Think I overdosed on the commas there.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:34 am #Damian
So long as you don’t overdoes on Liberal Lovejuice, Keri.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:35 am #keri
Not a chance in hell, Damien. Not a chance in hell.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:37 am #The Editor
Be careful of those semi colons as well, Keri. Especially eight in a row like this ;;;; ;;;;.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:40 am #Bron
I dated a Liberal once. For about 4 hours.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:41 am #Damian
Yep, that sounds like the bloke I knew, Bron.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:51 am #Bron
OK, I should explain:
1st hour - meet and greet
2nd hour - dinner and more drinks
3rd hour - discover he’s a Liberal toad
4th hour - devise plan of escape; made the escape
Since then, heard nothing from him. I’m guessing my response upon discovering his political allegiance was a turnoff for him. “Oh my God, you’re a… a… Liberal Party stooge! So, you’re conservative, right-wing, I take it?”
“Well, if you want to put it that way…”
“And you like John Howard?”
“Yes, he’s the best Pri-”
“Oh good Lord. I think the man is a horrible snivelling piece of runny snot! As for people who vote for him, well!”
“Uhm, thanks, I think.”
“No worries. We’re not going to get along, you know? I’m too left leaning for you, I reckon. Another drink and then get out of here?”
“Yes, I agree that’s a good idea.”
And that was that. Learn from my lesson: do not accept blind dates from friends who don’t realise that one of your passions is politics and social justice.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:53 am #Wah
Another option could have been the pictures of Bronwyn Bishop and Sophie Mirabella in their wallet.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:58 am #keri
See, this is why you don’t associate with them in the first place. It only leads to trouble.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 10:00 am #Damian
Gotta spot em early, though, Keri. Sometimes they sneak in with the humans.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 10:06 am #keri
To the best of my knowledge, I’ve never had that problem. Maybe I’ve just been lucky, though.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 10:11 am #Ray Dixon
This poll is lame. Young Liberals stopped reproducing and ceased all ‘related’ sexual activity as soon as Sophie entered Parliament. You cannot improve on perfection.
This is a fact. If you don’t believe it check with Landeryou.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 10:12 am #Bron
Or maybe you’re lucky not to have dopey friends setting you up with the most incompatible blokes, Keri!
Thursday 28 February 2008, 10:34 am #keri
That too. I’ve only been set up by friends once, and that ended in physical violence, so I’m thinking I won’t be going there again.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 10:41 am #Adam
Part of me finds this funny (using looks & personality as contraception lolol), but part of me finds inflammatory partisan guff like this really annoying when it’s directed at people with whom I share a likemindedness, so I’m gonna give this poll a skip.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 10:43 am #John Surname
Thanks for taking the time to tell us that. We could not care less.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 12:40 pm #Bron
Inflammatory? Dude, you ain’t seen nuffink yet.
Part of me is amused by your comment, Adam, as it displayed an oversensitive reaction that we’ve come to expect from the Libs.
Another part of me is annoyed that you clearly think it’s partisan and inflammatory and thus implicitly you think it’s wrong. But you know what? Young Libs do the same kind of “inflammatory partisan guff” shit to anyone who’s not a Liberal.
You can’t have it both ways. Suck it up.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 1:12 pm #Adam
I suppose this is Grodscorp and not Larvatus Prodeo so perhaps I should drink a glowstick & lighten the fuck up, but I just get shitted off when I go to AWH, Andrew Bolt et al and see their outrageous claims about leftists, and I’m not fond of encouraging behaviour against others that I rail against when said behaviour is directed against me. Oh and Bron you seem to think I’m a young Lib or some such thing, I’m actually a member of the Greens :-)
Thursday 28 February 2008, 1:15 pm #The Editor
If you drink a glowstick just after it’s been activated will your piss be fluorescent?
Thursday 28 February 2008, 1:17 pm #keri
No, but it’s a damn sight easier to get an X-Ray.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 1:42 pm #Peter
Hillarious stuff. I think it’s a toss-up between personality and intellect.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 1:54 pm #Bron
OK, Adam, you’re a Greens member. You have been absolved.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 4:42 pm #Damian
Good to see that “Heya” is getting some votes. It’s the eight dog on the outside, but it’ll take a lot of juice to get home from here.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 4:47 pm #keri
Given the size of the balls of most Liberals, I don’t think they have it in them, Damien.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 5:44 pm #Dave from Albury
I think we should all have conservative friends, well maybe not friends, facebook friends perhaps, it gives you a great insight into their thoughts. For example, I learnt that Hillary Clinton is responsible for 9/11, Rudi Gulianni is a moral crusader and I (a damn lefty) am a part of the population who are directly responsible for the drought.
Imagine my delight when I received a friend request from Lawrence Springborg the other day, I simply cannot wait to be exposed to the inner workings of the great man’s mind.
On the other hand, someone signed me up to the Family First mailing list and if I ever figure out who it was I will renounce my commitment to non-violence and deliver them a glassing.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 6:11 pm #Bron
If you unsubscribe from the Family First mailing list, expect a rather petualant, “fine! Don’t read our mail then!”-sounding email from them, like I did.
This is the last email you will receive from us. We have added you to our “blacklist”, which means that our newsletter system will refuse to send you any other email, without manual intervention by our administrator.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 6:12 pm #Bron
Damn quote thingys didn’t work. The second paragraph is an excerpt of the email I got from FF.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 6:34 pm #The Editor
Fucken SERIOUSLY? That’s awesome in its stupidity and petulance.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 8:06 pm #invig
*ahem*
I have joined the Liberal party.
*laughs*
:D
Thursday 28 February 2008, 8:52 pm #brokenleftleg
i’m a bit worried nobody has voted “looks” in the poll yet. Has anyone actually seen the average young Lib? They are butt ugly. Horrible spotty gangly things who haven’t developed any physical prowess because they’ve never done a hard days work in their lives.
And the fact that most of their nannies still wipe their arses at age 18 is a real turn off too.
Thursday 28 February 2008, 9:20 pm #Dave from Albury
One of my mates was joined up with the Nats as part of a branch stacking exercise and we have never let him live it down.
Friday 29 February 2008, 12:11 am #Jangari
I think you forgot my dear grandmother’s favourite contraceptive method, which, in its Sydney-centric vibe, is known as ‘getting off at Redfern’.
Friday 29 February 2008, 9:10 am #keri
brokenleftleg, even though the looks are a factor, you can close your eyes and think of England, so to speak.
Wheras with personality, there’s no blocking it out.
Friday 29 February 2008, 9:10 am #keri
And Jangari - ew.