GrodsCorp

Runners up, just like in life

Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:17 am

John Surname

Categories: GrodsNews

Tags: pub, trivia

I’d like to hear a round of applause for The; Fleshlight’s [sic] who came second in pub trivia last night. The combined talents of Craig, The Editor, Jeremy and myself weren’t quite good enough to stave off a table of New Idea reading women*. Also Jeremy spent the whole time complaining that he’s not down “wit da kids”.

Fo’ real.

*Tap

______________________
The Editor edits…

At the risk of attracting a beating from John for editing his post, I’d like to add that we missed out on first place by one point. One point that we gave away to the winning team in the first round.

Here’s how it happened.

The question was “what are the two superpowers that Hiro Nakamura from the TV show Heroes has?” Now, I’ve never seen the show but the other guys were across it. We wrote “time travel” and “teleportation”. When reading out the answers MC Jess (of Ausculture and Defamer fame) said that a team had written “space travel” instead of “teleportation” and she asked the floor if it should be marked correct. I argued — loudly and strenuously — that although space travel technically means moving from one place to another its common useage implies travel outside of Earth. After a few minutes of verbal slanging between me and the other table I conceded only to avoid the riot that was about to start. That point cost us the game.

So what do you think, GrodsReaders? Should I have conceded or should I have stuck to my guns?

39 Comments

Jayne (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:25 am) #

The Fleshlight’s ?!
Who on god’s green earth came up with that name?
Haven’t come 2nd in pub trivia since my team kept winning every week :P
(sorry that was cruel but I couldn’t resist :P )
John Surname (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:26 am) #

I’m proud to say it was me. We would have won but The Editor doesn’t believe in cheating.
Chuck A. Spear (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:28 am) #

So that’s why there is no Grodsthink. You were gallivanting around town flaunting your fame at quiz nights. Well your audience demands Grodsthink 9 guys. Maybe you should think about that next time before you get busy with a table full of New Idea reading women. You do know that it was New Idea who broke Harry’s cover don’t you?
John Surname (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:30 am) #

And how.

GrodsThink will be up within the hour.
Chuck A. Spear (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:34 am) #

Well chop chop. I don’t have all day… actually I do. I’ve sharpened all the pencils at work and I have made an instant coffee to have with an organic rye roasted pumpkin seed roll.
John Surname (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:36 am) #

Apparently Ed had to do a lot of editing. Ant was in defamation mode last night, and he made various accusations of the Pope that would be foolhardy to leave in.
Ant Rogenous (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:44 am) #

I still don’t understand why I’m not allowed to tell the story about how the Pope ****** me behind the Vatican bike sheds when I was an altar boys’ tour of Rome. If he had anything to be ashamed about, surely Archbishop **** wouldn’t have been filming it?

* Edited by The Editor
Chuck A. Spear (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:46 am) #

I believe there is a difference between the two. Why the fuck did MC JESS ask the floor? Is she on crack?

I’m be making an official complaint Ed.
Bron (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:48 am) #

A riot would have been well worth the win. What a shame you wussed out, Mr The. The kids at skool will never look up to you again in awe.
The Editor (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:50 am) #

I was afraid that Craig wouldn’t be able to defend himself if — as looked likely — the argument devolved into a fight with broken beer bottles.
John Surname (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 11:52 am) #

Throwing UDL cans never has the same effect as glass in the eye.
Bron (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 12:11 pm) #

But…but…Craig coulda used his chef’s knife.

Oh, it’s a butter knife, is it? Never mind then.
Ant Rogenous (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 12:17 pm) #

Craig’s social commentary cuts much deeper than any kitchen knife could.
Jayne (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 12:50 pm) #

Ohhh alright, you did the right thing to concede to ~~salivating, testosterone driven, maniacal trivia addicts hell bent on world domination through pub trivia nights and obliterating all opponents who dare question them~~ enthusiastic competitors.
MrLefty (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 12:52 pm) #

Oh, “space travel” is technically correct. He travels through space. It’s a nerd show, we should accept a nerd answer.

What I can’t accept is a pub trivia night which is entirely about New Idea crap. Where were the questions about Kazakhstan and Australian politics?
John Surname (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 12:55 pm) #

Jeremy’s two main interests.
The Editor (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 12:58 pm) #

If it was a quiz about Australian politics we would’ve been screwed!

We need to find a pub trivia night with questions about gay innuendo and Fleshlights.
keri (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 1:03 pm) #

Why not just start your own, Ed?

And James, I mean John, if I hear the words “And how” one more bloody time I’ll set the troll on you.
Damian (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 1:05 pm) #

Tap.*

* Tee hee.
Chuck A. Spear (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 1:05 pm) #

Is “and how” kinda like “just saying”?

Just saying.
John Surname (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 1:09 pm) #

It basically means “yes”.
Chuck A. Spear (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 1:22 pm) #

Like “no” means “yes” or “yes” means “yes”?
MrLefty (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 2:17 pm) #

“We need to find a pub trivia night with questions about gay innuendo and Fleshlights.”

Question 1: What is the name of a male masturbation aid designed to resemble, insofar as that’s possible in a manufactured item, a vagina?

Question 2: What, other than the obvious, does “something they can really get their mouths around” mean?

Question 3: What’s a “Fleshlight”?

Question 4: Which of the following is gay innuendo: (a) “Today’s dish is for those who like fire in their belly”, (b) “Beautiful, tender pieces of meat”, (c) “I’m tearing up”?

Question 5: In this picture of Spadgebob Fleshpants, what popular masturbation device has the cartoon character been designed to resemble?

etc
The Editor (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 2:18 pm) #

I reckon we’d fucken blitz that quiz, Jeremy.
EC (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 2:57 pm) #

Time travel and space travel are SO not the same thing. You guys need to recruit a Melbourne sci-fi nerd for trivia, we never back down!
keri (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 2:59 pm) #

I’m with EC here. Time and space travel are two completely different things. Both are relative but on seperate planes of existance, so the theory goes.

I get my information straight from Red Dwarf and Doctor Who, so I must be right.
keri (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 2:59 pm) #

And Mr.L, that was far, far too easy for you, wasn’t it?
The Editor (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 3:04 pm) #

Actually, the arguments were as follows:

New Idea reading table: Space travel is the same as teleportation because teleportation involves travelling, instantly, through space.

The Editor: Technically that’s correct. HOWEVER! Common useage of the term “space travel” implies travel through non-Earth space. You know, “out there”.

Nobody was comparing space travel to time travel.
Ant Rogenous (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 3:10 pm) #

Once the night was over, The Editor bet the New Idea-reading table that he could throw one of John Surname’s boots over the pub.
The Editor (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 3:12 pm) #

I once threw a copper kettle over a pub. Used my tie.
keri (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 3:29 pm) #

Isn’t that different uses of the word space, though?

And where on earth did you get a copper kettle in the first place?
The Editor (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 3:30 pm) #

It was just there in the pub.
magic bellybutton (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 3:31 pm) #

The Grods obsession with Fleshlights is finally getting to me.

On the weekend I mis-read, “I picked up my flashlight”, in the book I was reading.

It disturbed me a little. But amused as well, so it’s all OK.
The Editor (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 3:33 pm) #

I actually think it’s more of an Ant obsession now.

But welcome to the Fleshlight club, MBB. Good to have you on board. Soon you’ll be seeing Fleshlights everywhere you look. Kebabs etc.
Bridgit Gread (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 6:19 pm) #

‘Cocktail’ was on Foxtel the other night and for a second I thought Bryan Brown and Tom Cruise were dancing about with Fleshlights.
Mikey (Wednesday 26 March 2008, 8:37 pm) #

That other team should have copped it in the chin like a misfired money shot.

I say boo to them.
magic bellybutton (Thursday 27 March 2008, 7:40 pm) #

Soon you’ll be seeing Fleshlights everywhere you look. Kebabs etc - I just read that while eating a kebab.
John Surname (Thursday 27 March 2008, 10:38 pm) #

“‘Cocktail’ was on Foxtel the other night and for a second I thought Bryan Brown and Tom Cruise were dancing about with Fleshlights.”

I’m meeting Bryan Brown tomorrow. I’ll put it to him.
Ant Rogenous (Thursday 27 March 2008, 10:57 pm) #

As I was saying to Jack Thompson the other day, I can’t stand name-droppers.