GrodsCorp

Read and weep (and send abusive emails to The Editor)

Friday 28 March 2008, 3:44 pm

Bron

Categories: Blogosphere, Environment

Tags: EarthHour, GlobalWarming, RWDB, Sydney

Within three minutes of being asked if I would like to become a regular GrodsCorp contributor, I channelled Woody Allen for help and developed an ulcer in my stomach and called myself a shlemiel.

The pressure was on. The pressure to integrate myself into the GrodsCommunity as a worthy contributor meant that my debut post would have to be original, witty and instantly win the hearts and minds of lefties everywhere and incur the wrath of RWDB elsewhere. It also had to be Sydney-specific, to establish myself as the Sydney correspondent.

What better way to do that than to somehow invoke the gloomy spectres of Tim Blair and Andrew Bolt, I thought first to myself. No, was my immediate second thought. That was too easy. I needed something more illustrious. Something that was not going to sully my inaugural post. But it nevertheless had to be something to cause a widespread outbreak of collective frothing and foaming at the mouths of wingbats everywhere.

As I turned a corner onto Oxford Street in Sydney to a cafe on Thursday afternoon, deeply troubled by my personal circumstances, I was confronted with banners on lamp posts so large that I immediately knew what I was going to write. Only it wasn’t writing so much as pasting an image for all the global ~~warming~~ warmening sceptics out there.

EARTH HOUR banners adorn all of Sydney. OK, just Oxford Street in this instance.

There’s a LOT of them.

Tada. That’s my grand entrance out of the way. Sure, it was original, but the witty part failed miserably (and yes, I’m pre-emptively putting the boot into myself. Must I explain everything?). At least you cannot get any more Sydney than seeing a photo of Oxford Street, Darlinghurst, home to the gay community, kinky adult shops and nude live shows, and a liquor store beautifully named Lick Her Shop.

18 Comments

The Editor (Friday 28 March 2008, 3:45 pm) #

Why would anyone want to lick a shop?
Bron (Friday 28 March 2008, 3:47 pm) #

Hmmm. That’s a very good question, Mr The. I never thought of it that way.

Do tell, are you a half glass full or half glass empty kinda guy?
The Editor (Friday 28 March 2008, 3:48 pm) #

I’m not currently drinking anything. I don’t understand the question.
Bron (Friday 28 March 2008, 3:52 pm) #

Hard to believe you’re not currently drinking anything. It’s Friday afternoon, for God’s sake.
The Editor (Friday 28 March 2008, 3:56 pm) #

It’s my daily AFH: Alcohol Free Hour.
Ant Rogenous (Friday 28 March 2008, 3:56 pm) #

Wingbats! Did you just coin an insult, Bron? If so, bravo!

By the way, whoever hung those banners from lamp-posts was a genius — they’ll be unreadable when the lights go out.
Bron (Friday 28 March 2008, 3:59 pm) #

Wingbats! Did you just coin an insult, Bron? If so, bravo!

Nope, I stole it from somewhere around here. I was going to use “dingbats” but it came out all wrong.
Bron (Friday 28 March 2008, 4:00 pm) #

I still want that little Mini in the second photo. I noticed it coming towards me as I was taking the photo, and thought to myself, “Ooooh, me want!”

Reality is, me won’t get.
Almost Always Wrong (Friday 28 March 2008, 4:17 pm) #

I don’t think anyone here in Darwin even knows when Earth Hour is. Either that or they’ve all be influenced by Timmeh…which is far too horrific to comprehend.
Bron (Friday 28 March 2008, 4:33 pm) #

And Darwin’s supposed to be on top? Pfft!
keri (Friday 28 March 2008, 4:34 pm) #

Bron: “It’s Friday afternoon, for God’s sake” - Shouldn’t that be for Grods sake?
Bron (Friday 28 March 2008, 4:40 pm) #

Ah yes, that’s a good point, Keri, but we should not take Grod’s name in vain.
Terry Wright (Friday 28 March 2008, 5:27 pm) #

Is this the new Grods … all girls n’ stuff?

The Ed’s sober, Bron wants a girlie car, Keri’s not swearing, Oxford St and Timmeh in the same post without a joke and we’re talking Earth Hour on a Friday afternoon.

WHERE ARE THE FLESHLIGHTS!!!
Zombie Mao (Friday 28 March 2008, 5:41 pm) #

Grods has gone soft

Maybe a cross reference will revive them.

http://undeadfiles.blogspot.com/2008/03/2020-hippiefest.html
Bron (Friday 28 March 2008, 5:45 pm) #

Fuck, shit, fuck, shit, I feel responsible for this, Terry. I can’t make The Ed get pissed, I can do without a girlie car (I really would like a t-bird though).

What else is wrong? Oh yeah, Oxford Street and Timmeh in the same post without a joke. Carn, you want me to get sued, do you?

BUT! What’s wrong with talking Earth Hour on a Friday arvo? Everybody else is.

The Fleshlights are gone. I’m replacing them with something better. See new post.
Wah (Friday 28 March 2008, 10:16 pm) #

How silly were they to do Earth Hour during school holidays so the lefty teachers couldn’t brainwash the kids to make their parents turn the lights out.

I’m not sure if I’ll do it, I’ll probably forget, but the whole hatred to it is rather baseless. Even if you don’t beleive in the warmening what harm does concerving energy and stopping pollution do. Bolt’s just a mean spirited cunt who wants fucking (that last line was for Terry).
Wah (Friday 28 March 2008, 10:20 pm) #

Oh, it’s just come to my attention that NewsCorp staff were sent an email today from the top brass encouraging all to take part in Earth Hour. Let’s see if Bolt slags that off.
keri (Monday 31 March 2008, 9:28 am) #

Very fucking sorry about that, Terry.

I wasn’t aware that I swore so fucking much.