GrodsCorp

GroupThink FC petition

Monday 21 April 2008, 10:28 pm

John Surname

Categories: GroupThinkFC

Tags: GroupThinkFC

GroupThink FC losing yet another game

It’s clear by now that GroupThink FC are the suckiest bunch of sucks who ever sucked. I’ve seen teams suck before, but Jesus…

8-3

19-2

18-0

It’s come to the point that they are not only embarrassing themselves, but embarrassing us by association, so I am setting up a petition to persuade GroupThink FC to stop playing indoor soccer, and take up a sport that they are more qualified to play. Like egg and spoon racing.

Please leave your signature below.

30 Comments

Jeremy (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:37 pm) #

Fuck you, Surname. We’ve just been placed in a ludicrously high division at the start of our what-will-eventually-be illustrious career. Give us a go. Scores will improve when we’re not a bunch of newbies playing against teams that have been doing it for years.

GroupThink FC will do Grods proud. Just give it time.
John Surname (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:38 pm) #

No.
Jeremy (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:38 pm) #

PS you’re not invited to the celebrations when we finally win a game.
Wah (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:38 pm) #

18 nil is like conceding a score every 2.22 minutes - which even sucks in tennis.

Normally I wouldn’t knock anyone who has a go when I have the luxury of sitting back and doing fuck all - but yous guys have taken shit to such an art form I’m suprised you don’t receive government or lottery funding and launch each game with a red wine, canapes and speech.

See me as signing the petition.
Jeremy (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:42 pm) #

Hey, Surname. Want to check what names you’re commenting under, before running off to make smartarse posts trying to CRUSH OTHER PEOPLE’S DREAMS?

It’s not us being shit, it’s that we’re playing against pretty damn good teams that can belt a goal from the half-way line when we’ve played a total of, what, two hours in our lives?
Bridgit Gread (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:44 pm) #

So in three games you’ve conceded 45 goals and scored just five. I guess the burning question is who scored the five… or were they ‘own goals’?
Jeremy (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:45 pm) #

This post, by the way, is by a man who when turning up to play a game of soccer shows up in jeans.

You’ve got no credibility on this, Surname. None.
John Surname (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:47 pm) #

It was a qualifying game so I thought it wouldn’t matter. Plus my ex-girlfriend still has all my shorts.
Bridgit Gread (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:52 pm) #

Plus my ex-girlfriend still has all my shorts.

Is that a metaphor?
John Surname (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:53 pm) #

Unfortunately, no. She has my shorts.
Jeremy (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:53 pm) #

You thought you’d play a qualifying game in jeans?

Look, every new soccer team starts off losing. We were hardly going to romp in there, no experience, and kick the arse of well-honed teams that have been doing it for years.

We are getting better, though, even if the scores don’t reflect it yet.

Meanwhile - could people stop telling Surname the scores?
John Surname (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:55 pm) #

My tentacles are everywhere, Jeremy. You can’t escape.
THR (Monday 21 April 2008, 10:57 pm) #

It’s a low tactic in many ways, but, if need be, I can supply you with Latin Americans. Just ask. Your team will win, but many of you will be benched for a significant part of the game.
Almost Always Wrong (Monday 21 April 2008, 11:07 pm) #

Do they have the hand eye co-ordination, besides Jeremy’s freakish oh-shit-i-knocked-something-over senses for egg and spoon races?
Bridgit Gread (Monday 21 April 2008, 11:15 pm) #

My tentacles are everywhere, Jeremy. You can’t escape.

…and is that a typo?
Jeremy (Monday 21 April 2008, 11:19 pm) #

I’m disturbed by Surname’s tentacles, I don’t mind admitting.
Bridgit Gread (Monday 21 April 2008, 11:20 pm) #

I wonder if he wears jeans because his tentacles used to pop out of the aforementioned shorts.
Bron (Monday 21 April 2008, 11:23 pm) #

LOL Bridgit.

Now, petition? No, I’m not signing, I have faith in the team. Without faith, what’s left?

Hold on. Even WITH faith, what’s left? I think GroupthinkFC are beyond help with those kind of stats.

Sign me up to the petition.
THR (Monday 21 April 2008, 11:34 pm) #

Do they have the hand eye co-ordination, besides Jeremy’s freakish oh-shit-i-knocked-something-over senses for egg and spoon races?

Alright, they’re not Brazilians, but hey - Hondurans people! And all the Nicaraguans you could want…
Almost Always Wrong (Monday 21 April 2008, 11:49 pm) #

No roberto carlos’ to be seen, this is true.

Btw how shit must those teams have been to let them get 2 and 3 goals?
Bridgit Gread (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 12:12 am) #

I’m not signing any petition; I’m right behind the Groupthink lads. Who knows - maybe one night the opposition will misread the draw, fail to turn up and forfeit.
John Surname (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 12:16 am) #

It’s all they can hope for.
The Editor (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 7:38 am) #

That’s a first warning for everyone who’s signed this petition.
– The Editor, Administrator

Oh, and re Jeremy’s comment…

“This post, by the way, is by a man who when turning up to play a game of soccer shows up in jeans.”

Of course Surname shows up in jeans. He’s a nevernude and shorts make him nervous.
The Editor (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 8:17 am) #

When (notice I said “when” and not “if”?) we win our first game we’re hitting the pub and I’m taking the next day off work.
Ant Rogenous (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 10:59 am) #

Surname, does the word “strategy” mean anything to you?

Seriously, if it does, please share — we’re dying out there.
John Surname (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 11:04 am) #

The BALL (round thing) goes in the NET.
Ant Rogenous (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 11:18 am) #

Yeah, I know — I watched it go in the net 18 times last match.

YOU’RE NOT HELPING!!!1!
Almost Always Wrong (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 11:18 am) #

The main aim, is, as john has indicated, to put the round thing in the net, but when you do this you must make sure its the oppositions (the guys beating you) net.

Here’s some thinkin, just get everyone to stand in a semicircle around your net. a nil all draw is a step up for you.
JT (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 2:42 pm) #

Hey, we (meaning I) nearly scored in the first twenty seconds of the match. Beat the keeper and hit the far post. We could have been in front for the first time in a game.

Just be patient everyone. At the moment we maybe less competitive than the Melbourne Football Club, but one day……
krypto (Tuesday 22 April 2008, 4:03 pm) #

did that chick in the picture just lay an egg?
If she can do it on cue it might make an excellent diversion to distract the opposition long enough for you to score your arse off.