Real life sucks

Posted by The Editor on Monday 28 April 2008, 7:23 am
Categories: Life  Tags:

I’ve spent the last five days at Palm Cove, just north of Cairns, alternating between swims in the ocean, newspapers on the beach and beers in the poolside bar. I’ve been wearing nothing but a pair of board shorts and a thin sheen of salt; I didn’t even need to wear proper shoes for the wedding on Saturday as it was a thongs kinda gig. Yesterday I went out on my cousin-in-law’s yacht for a bit of a sail. In short, life has been very, very good.

Last night at 11:30pm I arrived into Melbourne airport wearing a shirt for basically the first time since last Tuesday. It was six degrees. This morning my alarm went off at 6:30am so I could get dressed in the freezing cold for a day of crowd control on a bunch of screaming kids out on excursion.

The life, it can suck sometimes.

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25 comments on “Real life sucks”

  1. Monday 28 April 2008, 7:52 am #THR

    At least Melbourne has a much finer local tabloid. And we have that attempt, in the Docklands, to rip-off the London Eye. Also, 90% of people look better in winter clothes than summer apparel.

  2. Monday 28 April 2008, 9:28 am #Ant Rogenous

    Ed, I think I speak for everyone in Melbourne when I say my heart bleeds for you.

  3. Monday 28 April 2008, 9:47 am #Bruce

    Hey. You could be homeless like me! ;-)

    Spare some change? Mister, you got any change?

  4. Monday 28 April 2008, 9:53 am #Bron

    Ed, I think I speak for everyone in Melbourne when I say my heart bleeds for you.

    Ditto from everyone in Sydney.

  5. Monday 28 April 2008, 9:53 am #Almost Always Wrong

    Teach in queensland. Problem solved anything else is peripheral.

  6. Monday 28 April 2008, 10:07 am #Wah

    While I apreciate you may not have has access to a Melbourne weather forecast, I can’t beleive someone as smart as you succumbed to the stupidity of many a Melburnian who goes to tropical Queensland and returns home as the season nudges closer to winter thinking that the clothes that sufficed near the Tropic of Cancer, would be suitable for the frigid air of Tulamarine at midnight - only to say as their hands freezes stuck to the trolley “fuck it’s cold here.”
    No shit!
    The only people more foolish are those who return from Bali simularly attired but with fuckin’ beads in their hair.

  7. Monday 28 April 2008, 10:16 am #Bron

    Gee, with this kind of “welcome home”, the Ed will be wishing he just stayed in QLD and to hell with us all.

  8. Monday 28 April 2008, 10:32 am #Jeremy

    Palm Cove is awesome.

  9. Monday 28 April 2008, 10:34 am #Bron

    Yes. Yes, it is.

    And to have the Ed coming back complaining so soon is just, well, annoying.

  10. Monday 28 April 2008, 10:58 am #Ray Dixon

    Spend 5 days at Palm Cove in the unbearable summer humidity and you’ll come back to Melbourne thanking your lucky stars you live in a normal climate. Victoria - the “new” Queensland.

  11. Monday 28 April 2008, 11:50 am #magic bellybutton

    I’ll be in Melbourne for a few days in July. I am not looking forward to it. I don’t have proper winter clothes seeing that I live in QLD.

  12. Monday 28 April 2008, 12:04 pm #Damian

    “I didn’t even need to wear proper shoes for the wedding on Saturday as it was a thongs kinda gig.”

    Awesome. Dem’s da best kinda weddings, I reckon. Sounds like a top trip. No wonder reality is hitting so hard.

  13. Monday 28 April 2008, 12:29 pm #keri

    Wah, I have to confess I did the same thing going from Melbourne to Vienna just after Christmas a few years ago. Mainly because there is no way known to man or, more accurately, me that I can travel in comfort in winter clothing.

    So I turned up at Vienna airport in a summery dress. At 6am. Whilst it was a sweltering -6c outside.

    But I did at least have a ski jacket in my carry-on.

  14. Monday 28 April 2008, 1:36 pm #Suburban Marxist

    “Real life!

    I’ll give ya ‘Real Life’! When I was a boy…

  15. Monday 28 April 2008, 2:23 pm #The Editor

    Youse fuckers really know how to make a guy feel special.

  16. Monday 28 April 2008, 2:25 pm #Chuck A. Spear

    Welcome back, dude. Did you get a tan?

  17. Monday 28 April 2008, 2:27 pm #The Editor

    As Nevernude Surname would say: and how.

  18. Monday 28 April 2008, 2:30 pm #keri

    Do you have to start that shit again?

  19. Monday 28 April 2008, 2:58 pm #John Surname

    Shut your God.

  20. Monday 28 April 2008, 3:01 pm #keri

    Hey, my God is like 7-11. Always open and garishly bright.

  21. Monday 28 April 2008, 5:53 pm #Bridgit Gread

    ‘Tis better to have been to Queensland and left, than never to have been at all. Or to have been to Launceston.

  22. Monday 28 April 2008, 7:24 pm #Mikey

    Never nude. Gold.

  23. Monday 28 April 2008, 7:27 pm #Bruce

    Wow. Everyone ignored the homeless guy, just like on the streets!

    I wonder if I should pee my pants to get a response.

  24. Monday 28 April 2008, 7:54 pm #Bron

    Probably not, Bruce. This blogg [sic] only attracts cold-hearted bastards.

  25. Monday 28 April 2008, 8:21 pm #Bruce

    Damn outta-touch inner city lefties! I ask for a roof and you give me a latte! Don’t you know caffeine is a diuretic?

    * Looks at pants in shame *

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