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Christopher Pyne, I could kiss you on the nuts

Saturday 3 May 2008, 12:21 pm

John Surname

Categories: Politics

Tags: ChristopherPyne

Stop the presses! All is well in the Liberal Party.

Christopher Pyne is full of confidence for the future:

Mr Pyne’s monologue - proclaimed in a voice many decibels louder than the hubbub in the dining room at the Jewel of India - made it clear he regarded his leader’s Gippsland strategy as a joke.

“Gippsland will be our Aston!” Mr Pyne declared theatrically.

Good for you, Liberals! You do your darndest to win that by-election!

“First Gippsland, then the Lodge!” Mr Pyne continued, parodying his leader.

That’s the spirit!

It was impossible for anyone else in the crowded restaurant, including this reporter, not to overhear Mr Pyne’s remarks, so loudly were they delivered.

It’s terrific that Pyne is so full of confidence and enthusiasm! Why, he wants to share it with an entire restaurant! He wants to share it with the nation!

Never stop your good work, Christopher Pyne. Your party needs more men like you.

Thanks to Steve.

14 Comments

cosmicjester (Saturday 3 May 2008, 12:25 pm) #

he may be a silver spoon brat with an annoying downer’esque accent but he deserves to be angry after his own party tried to smear him as a gay sex bathroom kinda man
The Editor (Saturday 3 May 2008, 12:28 pm) #

It’s even more effective if you imagine the words being spoken by Pyne’s sniveling, whiney voice.
Terry Wright (Saturday 3 May 2008, 1:26 pm) #

He was so loud because he was drunk!
steve (Saturday 3 May 2008, 3:33 pm) #

He was drunk because Nelson had convinced him that his interest rates, petrol prices and grocery bills were all going up and he has a bottle of red washed down with a bottle of cognac at any mention of the above three Nelson favourites.
albi (Saturday 3 May 2008, 5:00 pm) #

With the imminent departure of downer, Pyne is set to become the next principle toffee nosed ponce. He really is hard to stomach.
Wah (Saturday 3 May 2008, 10:34 pm) #

He was so loud because he was choco block full of rent boy - the filthy little Downer-lite
Mikey (Sunday 4 May 2008, 10:43 am) #

Classic stuff. Why don’t pollies learn Op Sec? They make us do it in the public service.
Bridgit Gread (Sunday 4 May 2008, 11:33 am) #

Check out his amusing web-presence, like the cunningly named ‘Pyne Online‘ or his whiny-arsed Youtube vids.
krypto (Sunday 4 May 2008, 4:15 pm) #

they’re dead in the water and they know it.
Cheeses the atmosphere in the Liberal caucus room must be like the inside of Hitler’s bunker with the Russians advancing in April ‘45.
Bridgit Gread (Sunday 4 May 2008, 4:22 pm) #

Someone should run with that idea and create a 2393rd voice-dub of the last scenes of Downfall.
krypto (Sunday 4 May 2008, 4:29 pm) #

nice, perhaps splice in some footage from the Hindenberg disaster for artistic effect.
Bridgit Gread (Sunday 4 May 2008, 4:32 pm) #

Narrator: “Oh the humanity!” Brendan Nelson: “All babies are born equal.”
krypto (Sunday 4 May 2008, 4:43 pm) #

what about the footage of the choppers with “ride of the Valkyries” blaring from Apocolypse Now montaged in there too.
“I love the smell of cum-uppance in the morning”.
krypto (Sunday 4 May 2008, 4:45 pm) #

mushroom cloud…blackscreen.