On Oxford Street getting some lunch just now, I saw this young woman, perhaps in her early 20s, screeching into her mobile phone, highly agitated and very off her rocker on something obviously recently consumed. Something naughty. Walked past (while keeping my head down and avoiding eye contact) and tried not to laugh as she screamed:

NO! I am a fucking CUNT, you fucking CUNT! Don’t FUCKEN interrupt me! I AM A FUCKING MORON, A FUCKING DIPSHIT, A FUCKING CUNT AND YOU KNOW IT!!! … WHAT THE FUCK!! I MEANT YOU ARE A FUCKING MORON, A FUCKING CUNT, A FUCKKKKKKING SHITHEAD, not me. I meant you all along, YOU FUCKING STUPID DOG!